Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. – Philippians 3:12-14
Before I started my Sunday run last night, I was content with finishing my 4 miles in 28 minutes. A 7 minute a mile pace is pretty good for running 4 miles because you work up a nice sweat, yet you’re not sprinting. I put my shoes on and in less than 5 minutes I was out of the door to beat the sunset. Now what happens next is not foreign and happens quite a bit to me, I’m working on this now. I started my run and was about a mile into it when a guy runs past me. In some crazy way, him passing me translated into him disrespecting me in my mind. Because the first step to getting over a bad habit is admitting it, I must admit that I am a pretty competitive person to a fault. As the runner passed me, my pace automatically picked up and I was suddenly on his heels. I followed this random strange runner mocking his pace making sure that my feet were hitting the ground at the same time as his for about 2 miles. His pace was much faster than my pace and my lungs were screaming, but I wasn’t going to quit and he is going to learn to never pass me again. At the end of mile 2, his pace started to slow up and I was about to make my move and pass him to show him who’s boss. To my dismay, the runner stops and starts to stretch. What?!?! This was mile 3 for me and I hadn’t realized that I had 1 more mile to go. I had an entire mile to go and my body was aching and crying for me to stop. At any point now I knew my knees would buckle and the t-shirt with “If I pass out call this number” idea that my dad gave me suddenly seemed like a brilliant idea. After I passed the runner and without my permission, my body down shifted to a crawl like jog. As I finally made it to the end of my 4 mile run, it had been 30 minutes, I was drenched with sweat, and I felt like I needed to throw up. Does this story sound familiar to you?
collage of marathons with friends
Maybe your story isn’t exactly like mine, but have you ever wanted what someone else had or wanted to be just like someone else? Staying focused is especially hard to do when you are comparing and competing with other people. Just like my situation where I was competing with the runner, you never know what happens when you are not watching. I didn’t know where the runner started, he could have only ran 2 miles and instead of me being focused on my goal, I was distracted and lost sight of the goals that I set for myself. In life we want the life of other people, we want their cars, their jobs, their shoes, their bags, their money and in reality we have no idea what the story behind their lives. God doesn’t want us to covet our neighbor but in turn wants us to delight ourselves in Him. Trying to be like others will burn you out, the same way I barely finished my run before the sun went down because I was focusing on someone else. The Bible tells us in Romans 12:2 not to conform to this world but instead to renew our minds. Let’s challenge ourselves to only compete with ourselves and push ourselves to do what God wants us to do and not what others push us to do.
In Him you have been made complete, and He is the head over all rule and authority -Colossians 2:10
As I was getting dressed this morning I heard a song by Tenth Avenue that made me think back to a month ago during my cheerleader mini-camp. Mini-camp is a fun filled weekend when us cheerleaders participate in various fun activities designed to help us bond as a team. The weekend usually consists of fun team building activities, personal safety workshops, dancing, public speaking, and more. I laughed so much I gave myself a stomach cramp. One particular activity that was challenging to me this year and hadn’t been in previous years was the public speaking exercise. It wasn’t so much the public speaking portion, but the questions our speaking coach posed to me. We have this dynamic speaking coach who flies in just for this portion of our mini-camp, his name is Ron. Ron does a great job of digging deep to help us become more aware of ourselves and each other. The only rule that he had this year was not to cry. Cry? Pah – leeze, that is easy for me. It was my turn to speak, I gave my speech and I was done, my teammates gave me good feedback and I’m ready to go sit back down. Not so fast. He made a comment and told me that he wanted me to come out of my shell and not just be a pretty face, but let people know who I am and what I brought to the team. “So Erica, what do you think you bring do this team?” was his question. His question resonated something inside of me because from that point on, I couldn’t think about anything else. Who am I? What do I bring to the team? I mean, I know who I am, but why can’t I express this? As I stood in front of all of my team mates, tears came to my eyes, and it was a wrap. I felt helpless, embarrassed and frustrated because I honestly couldn’t answer his question. I saw one of my team members raise her hand in an attempt to help me, but he insisted on making me do this myself.
two cute nerds
OK - now she really is a nerd, but a really cute one
love all around
my little sister from Japan
How many times are you stuck in a moment where you don’t understand your worth? Are there times when you ask yourself, “what am I good at” or say “I’m not good enough”. Have you ever made a mistake and continuously let that mistake define you as a person? At the end of the public speaking portion so many of my teammates came up to me and gave me big hugs and told me that they loved me and I mean so much to them. I still couldn’t think of who I was and what I brought to the team. As I thought about this, I realized that Ron challenged me. He challenged me to be more of a leader, not to be afraid of telling people my accomplishments, and to let my true light shine. I came to the conclusion that modesty can be somewhat of a flaw to some extent. I hate when people brag so I almost never tell good things about myself. I even hate it when my mom tells my family the things that I have done. This past mini-camp has shown me that you have to be confident in your accomplishments and the trials that you have overcome, not just for yourself but others. An example, when I was reading the book Cupcake Brown I was really encouraged to go back to school to get my PhD. Learning about all of her shortcomings and how she thrived through them all made me push myself to want more. After about 3 weeks, I can finally answer Ron’s questions. Who am I? I am a child of God and I bring His love, kindness, and understanding to my team. Don’t you know who you are?
love my captain for so many reasons one reason is she knows who she is and she makes no apologies for it
If you are having difficulty finding your worth and who you are these steps might help.
1. Know that you are a child of God. Period.
Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God -John 1:12
2. Whatever you have done in the past, let it stay in your past, you have been set free from it. Your past does not define who you are today.
In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of His grace -Ephesians 1:7
3. Find one good thing about yourself and embrace it. Be confident in who you are.
4. Think about one test or trial that you have overcome and share it with someone. You can encourage others too.
My Best friend just got engaged and I couldn’t be happier for her. It’s so funny how these things work and especially when we aren’t paying attention or planning for them. I remember when she first met her fiancé, she told me that he looked like a vampire. Then she asked me to go with her to her second meeting with him because he was in town. We went to the city and had dinner with him and his friends. It turned out that he was the male version of her, but not as mean. He was smart, dark, open-minded, and had the most genuine heart a person could have. I thought he was great, but didn’t think he would make the cut because my friend is such a little heart breaker. I tease her about that all the time. It’s been about four years and now they are engaged.
Bestie and her Fiancé'
I relate being engaged to being a Christian for the first time. Before you are engaged, you learn about this mysterious man. Your friends and loved ones want to hook you up with him, but you are still trying to figure things out. You hear from your family and friends why this new guy is the perfect man for you and you trust their opinion. You then start to think that maybe this guys deserves a shot, but you are in other relationships that you have to let go of first. You aren’t ready to stop partying and going out. You do a little research on him by googling him. Then finally you agree to go on a group date to meet him. You meet him and find him interesting. You agree to go on a second date, and then a third. Before you know it, you are going on dates with him every Sunday. You get to know him and you are spending time with his family and friends. It’s now been a year and he asks for your hand in marriage. Your heart is fluttering, but you have no doubt in your mind that he is the one for you. Finally you say yes. Now what?
Partaking in the celebrations
cool dudes aka our cool friends
When you accept Christ as your Lord and Savior and say yes that you want him in your life forever, just like a new marriage, it takes work. I’ve researched a couple of steps on how to keep your relationship with Christ new and fiery and also how to nurture it to help it grow. Like a new marriage, becoming a new Christian is synonymous with what you would do as a new couple:
1. Never stop learning about each other – Don’t ever stop learning about God. Even if you get to the point of reading the entire Bible through. Study the bible and learn how to be loving, forgiving, strong, and more like Him. Biblegateway (http://www.biblegateway.com/) is an excellent resource for devotions, reading plans, verses of the day, and more.
2. Communication – Talk to God and pray without ceasing. Prayer does not have to be formal, it is a personal conversation between you and God.
3. Tell your friends about Him – Friends and family are your support and should hold you accountable. Now that you are Christian, there should be no question about if you are or not. People should know by the way you carry yourself and act.
4. Hang out with other married couples – I’m not saying cut off your friends who aren’t Christian, but also find other Christian friends. You will find encouragement and the problems that you may face, your new Christian friends may have already encountered them and have great advice for you.
Being a Christian means so much more than going to church and saying that you are a Christian. Being a Christian means more than wearing a cross and being baptized. It’s a way of life. It means believing the Bible and relating it to everyday life. It means believing that Jesus is the Son of God and that He died on the cross for our sins. It means knowing the difference between right and wrong and choosing “right”. It means letting Jesus be the example of how life should be led.
You better watch your back because I'm watching Ari's
Oh, and it was her bday so I guessed she deserved Lucy
To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.”
The answer is Houston Rodeo Carnival. I visited Houston with family last month and one of the fun things we did was go to the Rodeo Carnival. With my first Rodeo Carnival came a lot of firsts. My first fried Oreo, first fried Twinkie, first gigantic turkey leg, first BBQ pork baked potato, and first foot long corn dog to name a few. Although there was more to the carnival than just food, eating was what I did with most of my time there.
And this is where the fun began. Eating fried Oreos and Twinkies opened the floodgates of deep fried, sugar filled and topped foods.
So good!
And then there was the “petting zoo”. Of course I didn’t participate! I’m sorry, do you know me?
Why a kangaroo was in the Houston Rodeo Carnival is beyond me.
This natural cutie is my cousin. She was prepared with her cowboy boots. What was I thinking?!? A missed cowboy boot opportunity for me
Too grown for rides, or maybe just too scared.
I love giving and receiving bear hugs. I need them in my life to survive. A bit dramatic…probably.
Had to end my trip with a burger and fries from Whataburger. I will probably catch heat for this but, I don’t get the hype. It wasn’t that great to me. Some people swear by this. The only thing that I loved were the ketchup packets.
I think the Houston Rodeo Carnival should be included in my yearly events. There are concerts that go on at the carnival for cheap prices, this year was Lady Antebellum. I heard that Beyonce used to go and perform every year. I wanna be there next year with my cowboy boots on and ready for whatever.
Do you remember Emma from “Survey of a Christianista: Emma“? Well she is married now!! I got to experience my first Beach Wedding and it was everything that I expected, but more. It was perfect weather, at a perfect location, and Emma was stunning.
so cute how her brother was helping her get dressed
Emma let her Brother help her get dressed but wouldn’t let me put more than a brush of eyeshadow on her face. This was the cutest thing ever.
location was Destin, FL
The perfect time to visit Destin, FL. Just after Spring Break and before Easter. The weather was perfect.
sisters!
You know us sisters had to be there styling and profiling like always!!
I want to wake up and go to sleep to this every day
It was such a beautiful experience. I’m so happy I got to relax and witness love here.
I love technology for the mere fact that it has connected me with people who I would have never met otherwise. I recently had the chance to converse via twitter with a young woman who probably lives thousands of miles away from me. Yet, she has inspired me like she lives next door. I was reading her blog and she wrote a simple yet strong post. The message that I got out of it was forgiveness. The type of forgiveness that God gives us which is very hard to give to others. The message I also got was accountability, she wasn’t making any excuses. She doesn’t blame anything on anyone, she just rolls with the punches and lives her life. In her post I love how she addresses him as “dad” and signs the letter as “your daughter”. Thanks girl, your dad is missing out!
Dear Dad,
It’s Shavra…yeah you know me! Wow time shooooo has passed. lol. I’m 26 now and I’m doing well. God has blessed me with so many things. I wanted to say thanks! Thanks for everything that you did for me. Even though you did nothing outside of conception I’m thankful for you. Why? Because all God needed was a seed to get me here and He knew that He had the rest covered. If you may be wondering…I’m fine. I’m beautiful, smart, goofy, in college, in the military, and many more. Nah really I’m well! How are you? You should be like a billion years old by now lol well maybe in your mid-sixties. I hope you know Christ as Lord and Savior. That’s all I want for you. To know God and his unfailing love….
Well!!!!! That’s about all I have to say about that!
Even if Shavra isn’t receiving fatherly love from her earthly father, I can tell her Heavenly Father is crazy about her. Forgiveness can lighten your load, change your life, release anger, help you move on and love again. No excuse!!
My bestie just had a baby girl and can you believe in the picture she was 71/2 months? She doesn’t even look preggo. She is beautiful!! With the way I eat and love to make excuses to eat, I know I will be quite the opposite when my time comes.
A sweet soul was taken away from this earth this weekend. A great friend and amazing dancer. I remember Victor as always putting in his own flare and flavor in our choreographed routines when we were all supposed to look alike. I remember Vic throwing in a head whip here and there and a kick when no one was watching. But I saw hi m. I saw him for the kind person that he was. I saw him for never giving up on love and always loving to the end. I saw him for how much he loved to salsa dance and how passionate he was about it. I saw all the effort he put into extra practices and cross training in different styles of dance to improve his salsa. I loved Victor Alvarez for being a friend to me from the very first practice we had together 5 years ago until now. It’s hard for people outside of the salsa scene to understand us Salseros. It’s hard for non Salseros to understand why we practice almost every day of the week sometimes getting out of practice at 1 am or later. It’s hard for non Salseros to see why we go out social dancing at least 3 times a week. It’s hard to understand how this hobby can be so expensive – paying to go to compete and perform at congresses and paying for crazy costumes. I feel blessed to be a part of the salsa scene/community/family. I feel blessed that I could share this experience with you Victor Alvarez. Victor you will never be forgotten.
Don’t forget….. when you are dancing away in heaven, practice hard because when I get there, we will finally compete together.
Te Extranos mucho. Dios te bendiga y descanses en paz,
the christianista
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; Courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; Enjoying one moment at a time; Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;Trusting that he will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; That I may be reasonable happy in this life and supremely happy with Him Forever in the next, Amen
This song is dedicated to my friend Victor who passed away on Saturday, November 27th. R.I.P. Victor Alvarez, I’m so proud of what you have accomplished and I will miss you my friend.
I feel like a ate a bass drummer who is steadily beating his drum in my stomach. I say the dumbest of things to try to seem interesting, ugh did I just say what I think I said? I can’t stop checking my phone to make sure I’m not in a bad reception area, I even call my Mom to make sure everything is working – “um yeah, hey Mom, sorry didn’t mean to call you, bye.” I check his facebook status for newly tagged pictures of him. I workout everyday to keep my curves solid and not mushy. I want to cook new ethnic food that I’ve never tasted to seem diverse. I keep my attitude light and positive, no guy wants a Negative Nancy. I tell myself to let the phone ring twice before picking up, but can’t help but pick up halfway through the first ring – “oh hi, sorry it took me so long to answer, I stay soooo busy.” The drummer in my belly beats a little faster and louder when I call him and wait for his voice. I googled him. Some people call it stalking, but I call it Internet research, don’t judge! I already love football, but I become obsessed with it around him because, hey, I wanna be a guys girl. I went to the doctor to figure out what was wrong with me and was diagnosed with puppy love. Dr. said there is no cure and it’s contagious. And by Doctor, I mean my good friend T.
Reading is one thing I can’t live without, whether it be magazines, news paper articles, Bible, or just books, I love them all. I’m not the most avid reader like my youngest sister who spent summers checking out piles of books per week from the library. I try to at least get three books in a week. Books allow me to escape and focus on something that no one else can see at the time. They grow me and most recently have inspired me. I just read a book called, A Piece of Cake by Cupcake Brown.
If you have a hard time finding inspiration, please read this book. This book is memoir a woman, now a lawyer at one of the top law firms in San Francisco, named Cupcake Brown wrote. She wrote about her journey from the bottom to becoming a lawyer which was just short of a miracle. This woman has survived rape, gangs, shootings, drugs, molestation, abortions, you name it, she’s been there. To the world her life was over, but to God, her life was just beginning. She found and befriended Jesus and realized that no power from human love could ever save her, but only God could.
Her story makes me look at my life and know that with God I have no limitations. I am limitless and so are you.
So today I realized that God is crazy about me. I love him and he loves me way more. Sometimes when I’m blessed with certain things that I know I don’t deserve, I feel like that little girl who has her Daddy wrapped around her finger. I feel spoiled by God. Out of all the people in the world, He loves me the most, or at least it feels that way. Have you ever received a blessing and thought to yourself that you didn’t deserve it?
I was reading a story about a little boy who was the only survivor of a plane crash and in good condition. Out of the 103 passengers and crew, this little 10 – year old boy survived. The media writes that this is nothing short of a miracle, but I’m writing that this is nothing but a blessing. After seriously thinking I was favored by God and that I had special attention, now I’m wondering is it possible for God to have two favorites?
God is so good that he makes us all his favorite. His omnipresence, love, and consistency is what keeps up feeling like #1. Psalms 139: 7 says it best:
7 Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? 8 If I ascend to heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in 1Sheol, behold, You are there. 9 If I take the wings of the dawn, If I dwell in the remotest part of the sea, 10 Even there Your hand will lead me, And Your right hand will lay hold of me. 11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will 1overwhelm me, And the light around me will be night,” 12 Even the darkness is not dark 1to You, And the night is as bright as the day.Darkness and light are alike to You.
No matter what you do, where you go, who you’re with, God will be there too. He will be your #1 fan, your best-friend, your life jacket, your go to person, he will be there because you are his favorite!
I was talking to my cousin the other day who is seriously dating her boyfriend and the topic of Pre-Marital classes came up. I shared my opinion that I think couples who are seriously dating should take Pre-Marital classes. You would have thought I said something deep and profound by my cousin’s reaction. She excitedly agreed with me.
The church that I attend believes that Pre-Marital counsel/classes are essential before marriage and especially beneficial to couples who aren’t engaged yet. I agree with my church in believing that by the time you are engaged and have the pressure of the ring, red flags and warning signs are easily dismissed.
The purpose of a Pre-Marital class is to guide you in learning more about your partner while growing closer to Jesus. You are supposed to learn or become aware of you and your partner’s differences communicative tools to work with those differences.
What do you think? Should Pre-Marital classes be reserved for the engaged? Share your thoughts.
I’m going to say NOTHING. I think Valentine’s Day is for women and we should be showered with gifts and love. Call me crazy or selfish, but I just think that women should be appreciated and loved even more on this special day. Valentine’s Day is for us, but if you HAVE to get him something, I suggest doing something special for him instead or buying something. If your guy is making you feel extra special throughout the year and you want to reciprocate that love, try doing something he likes or making something for him. Here are a few low key but thoughtful V-day gift ideas for him:
Make him 10 cups with 10 reasons why he is lucky to have a girl like you: You can use icing to put a number on each cupcake, and have a card with the reasons. You can also write numbers and reasons on the bottom of the cupcake.
Cook him his favorite lunch and attempt to play a sport with him: He will think it’s the cutest thing when you ask if he wants to throw the football around a bit after lunch. Have him teach you his sport of choice.
Make him a CD with all of his favorite songs with you singing or rapping the lyrics: This can easily be done with Garageband on Mac and YouTube. Any music on YouTube can be downloaded to your computer with mp3 converter (free online). If you don’t know the lyrics, don’t worry, you can Google most lyrics on the Internet. Once you have the soundtrack and lyrics, use Garageband on Mac to become the producer that you have always wanted to be.
Have your friends call or text him with reasons why you love him: I did this before. He will be surprised to have random people calling, but even more proud that everyone knows how much you love him.
Volunteer at a V-day program at Senior Citizen home: He will see and appreciate how you share love with others and also get some wise advice about love from older couples.
When I moved thousands of miles away from my family to start a new career fresh out of college, I met two amazing women who I became very close to. Both ladies are completely different from each other, but represent a part of my personality. A is very shy at first, but once she gets to know you , she can’t stop talking, just like me. S says whatever is on her mind and will offer her honest opinion if you ask her, this is one of my personality traits and faults. Both of these ladies are very giving; whether A is giving her time to the community or S is befriending someone who doesn’t have friends, they both inspire me to be a positive woman. I don’t mean to toot our horn, but we are known to turn heads when we walk into a room, it’s just a known fact, check our statistics. Lol. As hawt as we were(and still are), there was a certain point when we were all single and instead of going out, we would stay in on weekends and watch Sex and The City reruns. I remember A and I watching one episdoe when Charlotte said, “Don’t laugh at me, but maybe we could be each others soul mates? And then we could let men be just these great nice guys to have fun with?” I thought that was so sweet until A turned to me with the evil eyebrow and said, “Don’t you ever say that crap to me!” LOL. So despite A’s feelings about soul mates as friends, I decided to make a Valentine’s Day date just for my soul mates
Valentine’s Day last year, I decided to surprise A and S by being their Valentine! I scheduled them both massages during the late afternoon. It turned out that I scheduled for the wrong day, typical of me, but they still enjoyed it nonetheless. After their massages, I told them to meet me at my apartment. I greeted them with matching PJ’s. They did NOT want to put on the PJs but I insisted, it was too funny. It was even funnier when they finally put their PJ’s on, long john shirt with pants to match and both covered in heart designs.I cooked them dinner, pan seared salmon and salad. A would especially appreciate this since she only eats fish and chicken(barely). I also prepared a candy basket, which I ate half of the candy before they got there, an issue I’m still working on. So to make a long story short, we had a great Valentine’s Day, just us girls, us “soul mates”. Haha.
Share one of your non-traditional Valentine’s Day stories below.
Shouts to my girl (you know who you are) and someone else needs to hear this too. We had a long talk today and I just want to let you know that you are strong, beautiful, smart, amazing, and God is crazy about you. Don’t let ANYBODY tell you anything differntly. I know time may feel like it’s standing still right now, but after a storm there is calm and peace and sometimes a rainbow. I will be there for you through it all and so will God. I Love you!
I remember my first flight with my mom like it was yesterday. We had it all figured out, mom would buy a window seat, me an aisle seat. We were seated early, magazines ready, shoes off with warm cushy socks, snacks, and no one sitting between us. We were the plenipotentiary of our row, and had full authority of the empty seat that separated us. Between life, the juicy gossip in US weekly, and new fashions from Elle, we had a lot to talk about. However, as soon as the cabin door closed, so did my mom’s eyes. Wait, “wake up mom…mom, for real?” “Wake up, mom, don’t close your eyes all of the way, mom? “OK, don’t close your other eye, mom…mom, at least listen to the safety instructions!!” She doesn’t even move her head, or open her eyes, but out of her mouth, she says, “if this plane crashes, we all are going to die, so it doesn’t matter”. She doesn’t open her eyes for the next 4.5 hours. Ugh! So at this point, I realized that I would not have any conversations with my mom! Sadly, with no distractions from my mom, I actually paid attention to what the flight attendant was saying.
“…. In the event of a decompression, an oxygen mask will automatically drop from a compartment above your seat. To start the flow of oxygen, pull the mask towards you. Place it firmly over your nose and mouth, secure the elastic band behind your head, and breathe normally…… If you are travelling with a child or someone who requires assistance, secure your mask on first, and then assist the other person….”
This made me think about life and how we, especially as women, have tendencies to help people. If we can’t breathe, how can we help someone else breathe? In my past, I’ve always had a tendency to help the person I was dating at the time. I genuinely felt in my heart that I could help him or change him into a better person. When, in fact, I wasn’t in the position to help anyone. How could I help someone if I didn’t have it together myself? If I didn’t understand myself, take care of myself, know how to have me time, love myself, how could I share “love” with someone else? The answer is I couldn’t. Like the flight attendant tells us, secure your own mask first before you can help someone secure theirs.
So I was reading this book, “How to marry the man of your choice”that one of my friends has a joke and have come to find some very interesting points. The book which was written in 1984 by Margaret Kent(she has written a new one since) talks about how to get that man of your dreams. Lol. While this book is hilatious (my word for incredibly funny), it brings up a very few valid points. As I sneeze and wipe my fingers off on my jeans from the dust buildup on this book, margaret talks about the importance of self confidence as a woman. We always hear about how having self-confidence is attractive, but she shows us how an over confident woman is viewed through a man’s thought process:
She has a high opinion of herself
Therefore, she must be someone special.
She has a low opinion of most people.
Therefore, if she accepts me as her man, I must be someone special!
I’m sure you can’t go out and buy this book anywhere, so I will just give you “Margaret’s HTMTMOYC(How to marry the man of your choice) tips”. It only gets better. ROTFL. Actually, I should make a section for this.
This is my favorite dance routine from last season’s “So you think you can dance”. The dance is about a person trying to shake their addiction, but the habit is too hard for them to kick. As you can see, the piece causes some serious emotion.
I was in a long distance relationship for about 2 years. How did I do it? First of all, it wasn’t as hard as you would imagine. Secondly, it forced me to be wildly creative and think of ideas that I would’ve never thought of before. Lastly, it helped me to see and experience the relationship without the physical influences, but solely off of our personalities.
With all of the different technologies like skype, gtalk, chats, webcams, ichat, and even cell phones, the distance between two people in long distance relationships are slowly bridging.
I was talking to one of my friends, who is currently in a long distance relationship, about some things that she could do while in her relationship to make it more fun:
Make sure to constantly communicate – You aren’t able to see each other, so communicating is very important. Tones can be easily misinterpreted without clear communication over the phone and through text messages. In my relationship, my boyfriend at the time , didn’t like talking on the phone. Explain to your partner how important talking on the phone is and establish a time to talk everyday or however many times per week you decide.
Rent the same movie and watch it together – This use to be a favorite of mine. We would rent the same movie, play it at the same time, and stay on speakerphone to watch.
Dinner and a movie – Like the above suggestion but adding dinner. We would both go to Burger King while we were on the phone together and order and then watch a movie together.
ichat/gtalk/skype – watching a movie or just watching each other, ichat creates a sense of togetherness
Write love letters and send through snail mail – Sure, an email is great, but an actual letter is that much more special.
Send care packages – My boyfriend at the time would send me packages of random things from pictures to tshirts that smelled like him. You don’t have to go out and buy new stuff, just make it personal.
Send random I love you texts: One of my favorites “I’m here and you’re there. There doesn’t know how lucky it is.”
Send a CD with you singing your favorite love songs – So you may not be a Mariah Carey, but that doesn’t matter. Having a CD with your voice is something your partner will never forget. Youtube has many songs with just the music and the lyrics that scroll on the screen like karaoke. Use Youtube for your music and record using Garageband.
Define how long you will be in the relationship – Last but certainly not least, you can’t be in a long distance relationship forever. You need to define how long the gap in distance will exist in your relationship. Set a deadline or date.
These are just a few ideas to get you going, once you start, your creativity will take off. Some of these things can be done even if you aren’t in a Long Distance relationship. If you have things that are creative or cute that you’ve done in your relationshop, share them in the comment section.
